Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

Where did Lil' Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A deer. The fact that it has no eyes doesn't change the species.

So there are two skunks in a bath tub. One of the skunks says to the other, "Would you please pass the soap?", and the other skunk says, "What do you think I am, a talking radio?!"

What's purple and in my hand? Nothing i was lying about the purple

How do you stop a vehicle moving at high speeds? Apply the brakes in a reasonable fashion.

What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Jew? The Bucket.

Here is an opposite. Black Santa Claus.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS

A black man, a Jewish man, and an Indian man are all in the taxi when they were all killed in a car crash. Who was driving the car? The taxi driver.

Why can't february march Because april may

24

Why did the Nazi doctor drown a Jew in the lake? Because he felt like it.

An irish man walks out of a bar

SHEA CAPOLUPO HAS A TINY SHLONG. 8- turn your head sideways haha.

One time Chuck Norris cried. He felt slightly better after the experience, but, unfortunately, his grandmother still died of cancer.

an indian woman works at seven eleven. this is because her son has one leg and she needs to pay pay for all the medical needs.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies " My daughter just died of leukemia."

Q: What can you never see in the light, but you can in the dark? A: Darkness.

what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

what do you think when you see someone throw a man with no arms and legs into the ocean? chances of survival are minimal

jack and jill climbed up the hill but they were bagels

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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