What did the door say to the hand? Please stop caressing me!

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What do you get when you cross a fan with a child? A mess that you now have to clean up.

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an indian woman works at seven eleven. this is because her son has one leg and she needs to pay pay for all the medical needs.

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why am I writing this...im bored

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Your mom's so fat that she went in to get liposuction and subsequently died from infection.

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How do you get a bird off the roof you throw an ax at it

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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What do you do when a man in a corner offers you candy? You walk away.

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why did the one handed man cross the road? to get to the secondhand shop.

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Roses are red Violets are buckets This poem makes no sense Boobs

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a cucumber

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THEY SAY SEEING IS BELIEVING. I NEVER SAW 9/11! 9/11? NEVER HAPPENED -Jonathan

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I can't remember if I have Azheimer's or not.

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Leslie's husband admitted to being gay, which came to the surprise of no one, seeing as Leslie is a man.

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What's the same about eggnog and a computer? You can search the web. Except that's only true for one of them.

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Why can't Jimmy walk ever again? Because when he was 12 his father mistook him for a plank of wood a sawed his legs off. We may realise here that this prohibits him from walking.

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack addiction. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And is then a homeless broke man who does not even have 4 quarters to his name.

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Anne frank dies days before camp was liberated.

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's a women. Why can't Stephen Hawking speak freely with his voice? Because he's autistic.

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When life throws you lemons, duck.

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Adam Claypool walks into a bar. He immediately sucks the bartender's dick because he is the biggest queer anyone has ever seen

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k

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How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

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YEAH WELL SMELL YOUR BREATH U BELLEND

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops