Why did the chicken cross the road? It had places to be

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Tell my wife I died doing what I love... Not her

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Why did Jack got late to his date? Because he was playing Call of Duty and forgot about the time.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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John Stamos.

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What's 1 + 1? Fish. What's 2+2? Window. pie.

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Knock knock Who's there? Death. Come with me.

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Why do you not play poker with a cheetah. 1. Animals can't play card games. 2. Cheetahs are carnivores. Think about it.

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What's worse than finding a fly in your coffee? The holocaust. What's worse than that? Two flies in your coffee.

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What's the difference between a truckload of dead babies and a truckload of bowling balls? You can't unload the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Q: Where does charlie sheen shop? A: Winners

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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A chronic hemophiliac walks into a bar. He cuts his leg and bleeds to death.

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what do you call a dead black man? dead

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whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

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what did the blind kid want for christmas? world peace.

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Q: What's worse than a rainy day? A:

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Dad, why are we Swedish? Because antilopes and the butterfly effect son.

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Guess What! HI!

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What's green and looks like a red truck? A green truck.

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They say animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming. Like the night before that last earthquake hit, our family dog took the car keys and drove to Arizona.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? My cheese

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whats polish and black a polish black person

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What is the defference between an apple and a banana? Horses, because vests have no sleeves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops