Yo mama is so skinny, when she sits around the house, she sits comfortably in every chair. - Stephen Colbert

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It was a dark night, I was walking home from the shops in town, The wind was whistling through my damp hair, My spine tingled and i tucked my hands under my stinking pits. I felt like someone was watching me, I walked faster the breath was warm on my kneck i turned around. It was gary glitter he pulled down my pants and gave me the best sucky i ever had. We kissed and i tasted the cheese from my knob. In all garry glitter has a giant knob

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what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

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What did the Vietnam veteran see on Christmas that changed his life? Nothing, he was blind. He continued to live his life in the same way, begging for drug money and getting bullied by all the other homeless vets.

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Sorry I am like so fucking wasted still, I keep giggling and laughing all of the time.

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A redhead walks into a hairdressing salon and asks to have her hair dyed black due to being a subject of bullying and social rudeness.

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What do you call the guy who made this page. Answer: A sucker mouth bitch.

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Why couldnt the woman wear her new necklace? She was decapitated

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ginger

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oooh look a banshee

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

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How do you scare Chris Ferguson? No one knows, he always has a pokerface on.

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What's big, brown, and full of crap? A septic tank.

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Why can't a blonde woman drive? because she was shot in both legs and cannot operate the pedals without extreme pain.

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amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

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What is dark, funny looking, black, and rhymes with osama? A black lama.

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What did the teacher say to the pupil who was bad at maths? You are bad at maths and will never complete any sum EVER!

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Q. Why did the boy get so fat? A. From playing Pokemon Pearl Edition

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Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

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What happens to men who grow up. They are probably taller

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What did Bear Grylls say to the dead whale? Mmmm.

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whats worse than a dead cat in your apple? a dead baby in your apple.

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Why did the guy die? He had a fatal heart attack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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