What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because I can tell by your accent.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Toys -Lets Go MEts

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two nuns were driving in Transylvania when a vampire jumps out in front of their car the first nun said "show it your cross" so the secong got out of the car and yelled Get out of the way you pric!!!!

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An boy with ADHD walks into a

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What do Texans call cows? Cows. Calling them almost anything else would be utterly illogical.

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Like if you like big tits.

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Why did the Filipino hate internet advertising? Because navigating around a webpage with pestering visual and audible promotions often proves cumbersome and distracting from the task at hand.

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What did the dog say when the woman put a sweater on him? Nothing, dogs can't talk and he has no idea what is going on

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What's large, green, and pissed off? The dumpster out back

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Your mama is so fat, her gravitational field varies with distance cubed!

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What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Helen got hit by a bus. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Helen!!

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Teacher: Billy what do you want to be when you grow up? Billy: A fireman! Teacher: Tommy what do you want to be when you grow up? Tommy: 9/11

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Throw it off the top of the Empire State Building.

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what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

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Dat ass, or dem titties? Your choice.

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What happens when you shoot a priest in the heart? He dies.

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How do you punish an electrician? Kill his family.

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69

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where are you?

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A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

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The WNBA

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm Blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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