Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

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I met an Asian man in Beijing, and he had very small feet. You know why? He was a midget.

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Why did Little Billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a washing machine.

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Guy 1: Yo dawg Guy 2: DID yOU JUST FUCKING CALL ME A DOG>/?>/???? Guy 3: Yea

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what did Barak Obama order at Dunking Donuts. a donut

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What do you call a drunk cannibalistic Jew? A HeBrew!

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Ask me if I am a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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Knock Knock whose there? child abuse...

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Your mother is so ugly that she looks like you.. :)

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Roses are red Violets are penis

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Why Oscar lives with elephants in a zoo ? Because he's an elephant.

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How do you make a Hispanic man sad? Answer: steal everything he has until he has nothing

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What do you tell the woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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What does a Dominican and a Russian have in common... they are both thinking of a funny anti-joke to post on this site...

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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You`re honor, he fell off the staircase, I demand that staircase ends up in jail! Case closed.

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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why is the asian still in the driveway? her car broke down

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Stubbing your toe

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yo mama so fat that the doctor asked for her weight not her phone number!

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"We wear pink on Wednesdays"" -Mean Girls, 2004

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What did little John get from reading this. Wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest.

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops