A man walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks, and goes home an hour or so later.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 'Cause 7 slept with 8 and punched 4 in the face.

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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How much carlins does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

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What's 1+1? Window! Just kidding it's 2.

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How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

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whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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whats beter than a dead pile of babies? the alive one that has to eat its way out

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Dont be mean Dyslexics are teople poo

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What did the blind man get for Christmas? Poison.

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Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

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What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

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what is the difference between oral sex and anal sex? one has to deal with a butt

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What is samios' favorite position? ;) Full back... In the bum.

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What's brown, dirty, and smells like feces? Feces

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frost bite.

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What's a zombie's favourite dessert? I don't know, but I'll give you 50 bucks to go and ask one.

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? because he was a happy guy

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Ian is cutie!!!!!;)

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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How do you make a homeless man cry? you throw away his trash.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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