How do Jewish people celebrate Christmas? Jewish people do not celebrate Christmas, for Christmas is an annual commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ, celebrated generally on December as a religious and cultural holiday by billions of people around the world. A feast central to the Christian liturgical year, it closes the Advent season and initiates the twelve days of Christmastide. Christmas is a civil holiday in many of the world's nations, is celebrated by an increasing number of people, and is an integral part of the Christmas and holiday season.

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A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

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What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

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- How do you keep an idiot in suspense? - How? -......

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What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

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How do you spell Madeleine Mccann? I A N

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How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

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Your mother is so obese that the extra weight is putting strain on her knees she now needs knee surgery.

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One night you tell your mom to make you a sandwich, the next day in school you ate a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch

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What do you call a Mexican man in prison? A prison officer.

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What has 14 eyes, 14 legs, 70 toes and 7 noses... 7 people.

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What is brown, smells like shit and on fire? A muslim after the bomb vest malfuctioned!

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What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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Your mom is so fat, she has diabetes.

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What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

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Why happened when a clothes line walked into a bar? He got hung over

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Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

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How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

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Whats worse than dieing of Alhzymers? Anal Rape

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops