Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

star wars kid

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

Whats the best way to tell if your wife has been cheating on you with the UPS guy? simply ask her, trust and communication in relationships are vital in their survival and growth.

Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

What'd the mexican get for his birthday, birthday cards from his friends and family.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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