What do you call a mexican and a African? Two people with no water.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

jess always squints her eyes when making a point

whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

I'm Andrew Schmitt

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Postman. But I wasn't expecting a parcel. Is it for 37? No, Sorry, its for 35.

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

Why Did the throw up He was sick

"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

Do you know whats funny? No do you know i was asking a question

guess what what ...

Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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