Why did the squirrel fall out the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out the tree? It was stapled to the first squirrel Why did the the third squirrel fall out the tree? Peer pressure Why did the fourth squirrel fall out the tree? It thought it was a game Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a squirrel Why did the postman die? He got hit in the head by four squirrels and a tree

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

thumb_up thumb_down +31

interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

thumb_up thumb_down +29

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A Black Man Walks Into an Office For A Job Interview. The Meeting Goes Very And He Soon Has A Very Nice Steady Job.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

You know what they say about a man's feet... No i don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How did the man die? He was killed alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops