Q. What has two legs and is covered in red stuff? A. Half a dog

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

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What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

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Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

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What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

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What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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What is your name? My name is Jeff

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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A Chinese man fails a math test

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roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

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Roses are red violets are blue ice-cream is yummy can I eat you

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A black guy and a white girl are having sex. The white girl screams "I'm pregnant!!!!" The black guy says "i'll help you take care of it" "I love you sweetie and nothing will come between us"

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"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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