How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

A man walks into a meat shop. Man: I bet you $20 you can't reach the meat on the top shelf. Butcher: The steaks are too high

What did The Black man have for breakfast? Bran Flakes.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

Theres two things i hate in this world... racists . . . and black people

Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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