I know 7 facts about you: 1. You're reading this. 2. You hate this overused shit. 3. You may think I will skip a number. 5. And you hate me much more. 6. You have seen porn. 7. You want me to kill myself. I am just gonna go suicide.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

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What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

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Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

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Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

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I was walking down a railway line the other day... I was fined £1000

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Q: What's funnier than rape? A: Many things such as murder or nuclear warfare.

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Anti-Joke is a knock-off.

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wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

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Bro: Aww Dawg! What if they tell me I got da aids? Dawg!: Hey don worry bro, you gotta BE POSITIVE

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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your momma's so fat that we are all seriously concerned for her health.

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Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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A banana walks into a bar many people leave considering bananas certainly don't walk. many people are wondering if they are dreaming

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Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

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phil - "honey, why is the picture quality so bad" Phil was watching a toaster

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Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

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Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops