whats red and green and has 8 wheels. a stick

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A man walked into a pole barn oh wait I meant a pole bar so it actually hurt.

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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Your mum so ugly that she isn't married

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

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What happened when Suzy fell off the swing? She hurt herself.

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A: Knock Knock (pause) B: Please use the doorbell, it is very late and I like to be considerate of my neighbors

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Jordan is pregant

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What's the difference between a pizza and a girl? I've stuck my penis in a pizza

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

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I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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I typed in in a Anti-joke and realized it was kind of hard.

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Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

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What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

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Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

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How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

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What do you call a dolphin without a head? Dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

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What is the best thing in the world? The opposite of the worst thing in the world.

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How many easily offended people does it take to change a light bulb? Shut up, that's not funny!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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