What did Bambi say to her mother when her mother was killed? Nothing. Bambi's a deer. Duh.

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If I had a dollar for every time I heard a 'women's rights' joke I'd be bill gates.

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Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

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your mommas so stupid she tried to climb mountain dew well im glad your mom is intrested in trying new things

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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why couldnt the guy move his legs cuz he was paralyzed

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42

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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Roses are red, and violets are freakin violet. Not blue.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

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This is not a joke.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

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Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

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Q: why was the baker a coward? A: his own mother told him his potential would amount to nothing more than a baker and when a dinosaur came into the bakery he ran away

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How many pastry chefs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. It's a fairly simple job.

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What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

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what did the indians give the pilgrims? syphylis

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so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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