A guy takes out his club and hits a baby seal with a fine for $50 for littering and threatens to smash the seal's favorite ceramic figurine with the club if he doesn't pay the fine. The man is a park ranger and takes littering very seriously.

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David shut the fuck up your cat has asthma and i dropped a weight on its little fucking head that pikey should of drowned it furthermore your sister looks like a greasy alien

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

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A man and his young child walk into a clinic to get physical check-up. The man learns from the physicist he doesn't mater. His wife remarries and start having frequent sex and the child is scarred for life. This is irrelevant because both parents don't exist and this is all a constant delusion in an psychiatric hospital.

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On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

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What do kittens and napkins have in common? You can sneeze into both of them except the kitten doesn't like it

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You are so ugly that when you were born the doctor didn't say anything to your mother because he has social manners.

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What Happens when you shoot a deer? It's Dead

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Why did you loose the basketball game? Because they scored more points than us.

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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727-8088-954 Call Me. Say your name is Nick whether or not your a guy or a girl.

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how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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What colour is an orange? Orange. What did you expect?

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Your momma so stupid, she speaks poorly and can't spell very well.

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What do you get when you cross a pug and a beagle? A cross pug and a cross beagle.

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Whats funnier than a black guy dieing? Everything thats not funny

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What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

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i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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