A man is sitting on his couch. The lights go out and his TV begins to float away. He breaks down into tears believing he has been cursed for a crime he commited earlier.

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Around 10PM on a Saturday two Irishmen walk into a bar. They order up a round of drinks, and comment on the appearance of several women in the place whom they believe to be single. After finishing up their drinks, the one Irishman asks the other if he'd like another one. The other says no, that he promised his wife he'd be back soon with diapers for the baby. He thanks his friend for the drink and leaves for home. The remaining Irishman orders up another "round" from the bartender, but really it's only one drink he is ordering, being he is only one person.

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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D/M/Y ~~ Take 21/12/2012 Flip it upside down Take the 2's out from both ends (1/12/201) Take out all the ones and two's (//0) Take your zero and turn it 90 degrees to the right Take out the forward slashes What you are left with, a potato.

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A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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A black man walks into a bank with a gun. He then clocks in and takes duty because he is a security guard at the bank.

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this new cologne, it's kind of gross smelling.

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What is long, hard and comes out of a gay persons bum? poo

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God made Coke God made Pepsi God made me, Oh so sexy

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What's brown and adhesive? A stick

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ACT 2 CHAPTER 4 GEARS OF WAR 3 TICKER EASTER EGG.... MICHAEL VICKS HOUSE

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one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Steve. Steve who? I just said it was Steve

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Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

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I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

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whats the diffrence between madeline macan and a submarine? there isnt one there both at the bottom of the sea and full of seaman

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

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What happened to the boy that got raped? He later died of depression

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what's an advantage of breaking every bone in your body? nothing, you're screwed.

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laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer, then you will die.

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whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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