What do you call a deer with no eyes? A shocking example of the cruelty suffered by animals at hands of humanity.

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What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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Knock Knock The doors already open

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

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What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

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Chris: Hey, want to hear a sad joke? Joe: No, those are mean and offensive.

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What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Doctor" "Interrupting Doc-" "You have Cancer'

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What smells like smoke, sounds like a pig, and looks like a horse? My mom's boyfriend

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so a guy walks into a bar, he says nothing for he now has a concusion

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Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

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Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

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Why did the man have an extremely large nose? It just so happens that both his father and mother had large noses as well and nature took it's course.

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What's worse than a teacher yelling at you? The holocaust

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Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

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Guest what? Dog

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

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Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

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How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

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Why did the boy get diagnosed with Cancer? I don't remember I have Alzheimers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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