She was so hot every guy instantly jizzed upon seeing her. Even seeing her fingernails gave boners to thousands of people. Poor thing never had sex, no one could hold it in until they started. Maybe only Chuck Norris.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Three men of different ethnic and socio-economic upbringings enter a pub. A strange situation befalls them or a question is posed. The first two respond in turn, in manners typical of their profession or educational background. The third, however, either draws on his specific expertise and responds so as to outwit the others, or makes an egregious and pun-filled blunder, leaving himself open to mockery by his peers.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the baby stop crying? I shot it with a 9mm pistol and put it in the microwave because it cried while I was watching Sienfeld.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Robert Muldoon: "Clever girl..." Velociraptor: "I appreciate your compliment, but I will still eat your face."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Did the owl ever reach the middle of the tootsie pop? Yes. Dreams do come true

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many NRA members does it take to change a lightbulb? MORE GUNS!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Did you know? that if you were to stretch out all your organs to see how far theyd stretch? youd die.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

think twice or at least think

thumb_up thumb_down -11

whts worse than finding a worm in your apple? butt sex with the devil

thumb_up thumb_down -11

your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Liverpool City Football Club

thumb_up thumb_down -11

your life

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock Who's there??? Your mom

thumb_up thumb_down -11

This site has ads. and so does every other free site

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What looks like midnight and is addicted to shemale porn? Xavier Jordan! Courtesy of Mrs. Maxwells 7th period

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is worse than being unemployed? Terminal Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the Momma Kangaroo say when she couldnt find her baby?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Nuneaton..

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Tourette's, PENIS.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

thumb_up thumb_down -11

hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: What cant you give a black guy? A: Black eye, lips, and a jon

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops