Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

What do you call an Arab driving a Plane? A Pilot.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge. Why did Sally fall off her bike? She was hit by a falling monkey and fridge.

What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

What do you call Morgan Freeman at a family reunion? Morgan Freeman.

What's white and horny? a unicorn.

Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

Bin laden walks into a bar oh wait he's dead.

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

Knock knock Who's there? NYPD you are being placed under arrest come out with your hands up.

Once upon a time

how do you call a big red creature eating rocks? the big red rock eating creature.

Pianos.

why was the old man on the ground he fell

I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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