A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is also blue

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's brown and sticky? Molasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

The Walmart Scooterwhale (Terracetus obesitus) is the only member of the cetacean family to live in a terrestrial environment. Commonly found in large-scale grocery stores all across North America, it subsists mostly on fattening junk food, microwave popcorn, and beer.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

-Knock, knock! -Who is it? -Me

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the little girl with no legs or arms get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock knock? Who's there? Not that little girl.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Your mother is so ugly it affects her self esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you beat a black man in a race? You run faster then him.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why was Andy's resume declined? Because he was molested as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

So an African American man and another man of Hispanic, more specifically Mexico, are riding in the backseat of a car, who's driving? Probably their private chauffeurs, but most definitely not someone related to the Police Department.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What happened to the house that was made without concrete? It fell over.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What time is it when an elephant steps on your watch? Time to go to the hospital and get treated for a shattered wrist.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats the king of the forest, is the color brown and is red all over? A deer or someone's soon to be dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the Ethiopian get for Christmas? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops