Why did the cook put rubber bands in the spaghetti Because he was an asshole

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They say you are what you eat, but i don't remember eating a big bowl of sexy.

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17

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What did hitler give his granddaughter? A gas bill.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

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Why did you step on my watermelon?

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2 beavers enter a bar, destroy all the stool legs, and leave.

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Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

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Turn your Caps Lock off, people think you're yelling at them, Stephen Hawking.

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Q: How do you make three atheists cry? A: Kill their families.

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Prostate exam > Some of these Anti Jokes

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four blondes where on their way to disneyworld they see a sign that say disneyworld:left so they turn around wondering where disneyworld went

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What is black, white and red all over? Something that pertains those characteristics

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your neighbor. My neighbor who? I told you already, it's pronounced "Wu" I'm very sorry Mr. Wu.

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What do you get if you cross if you cross an overweight woman with a pair of very tight trousers? Exactly that, an overweight woman in inappropriately tight torusers.

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Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Some of the people on this site who write these "jokes" are complete morons. Many of them believe that racism, sexism, and spamming is hilarious. Each one of them is a ****ing dumbass and needs to be removed from this site. Racism is not funny, people are murdered because of it! Those who think that they are being funny by insulting others need to get a life and stop ruining this site for others who want to read good jokes free of racism. Africans, Hispanics, Jews, and everyone else deserves better than to be insulted like this. And I'm a white, so take that you racist whores! I apologize for those of you who have good humor that have to read this, but those other jerks need to be told off.

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Q: Why did the little boy have freckles? A: Heredity

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Is Charlie Sheen bi-polar? Yes.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

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Women's rights.

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Why did michael jackson wear white gloves around young boys? His doctor recommended that he do so due to bad circulation.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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