Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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I hate long jokes -_-

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I walks over to da shop de oother day and there was this guy and he was like... I bought some petrol. LOoooooooooL

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How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

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Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because Hitler took he's parents away.

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What sound did the man make? Splatt. He fell off a building.

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What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

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Your momma's so fat that she can't pass through some turnstiles and needs go through some other way with people staring and feel sad about it.

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People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

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i am writing this because i felt like it.

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"Knock knock..." "come in"

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What happened to The Guy when he got pissed on he was wet

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A white man, a black man, and an Arab man are standing in a room. Who stole your wallet? No one, you suffer from ALS and therefore do not carry a wallet because you have no way in which to use it. To top it all off your medical bills are so high that your family would be financially better if you were to die and your dream of being an entrepreneur is slipping away as you realize that pitching an idea is difficult in a monotonous drone.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Get in the car."

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Q:What did the frog say to the mailman? A:Nothing theres no mail on Sunday's.

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What do Michael Jackson and most Catholic priests have in common? They're dead.

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

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What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

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Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to the restroom and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. He goes to the restroom again and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. Guess what happens next? A. He goes to the restroom to urinate B. He buys another drink C. He flirts with a very attractive lady D. Goes home and masturbates

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled

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what kind of dog has no tail? a hot dog

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Skinny guy: Hey wanna hear a yo mama joke? Fat mother: Hey you wanna die?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops