Fact: When you die, you can't eat ice cream!

-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

~Roses Are Red~ ~Violets Are Blue~ ~I Am Straight~ ~Not Sure About You~ ~Tell us?~

Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears Because he's a rabbit

There was porn on the Internet I masturbated to it, but my parents caught me, and I can't ever leave the house again until I'm 18.

Q: What did Bobby get for his first birthday ? A: Adoption papers

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

Why the chimp fell off the tree? Because it's dead.

yo mamma so ugly I think she has cancer

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Why did the chicken cross the road!? He was supposed to be dead! You are by far the most incompetent chicken assassin we've ever had. You're fired.

What's the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same

Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

Is your refridgerator running? because if its not, you should probably have it looked at by a repair man,

Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

A elephant drowns when it was swimming, why did this happen? Who cares its already dead!

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man running the stand. QUACK!!!

Knock Knock! Who's there? Steven. Steven who? Steven your neighbor, may I please come in?

how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

My aunt said slow and steady wins the race....... She died in a fire

I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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