1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? To see outer space

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What do you call a Chineses filled with bus?

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Why did the weird, creepy old man in the beat up van give ice cream to the little girl? Because his company went bankrupt and as part of a court order, he was thereby forced to give away the remaining contents of his inventory to those who seeked it.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? After hours of waiting for the perfect victim, the boy spotted an elderly woman walking down the sidewalk. The clock barreled through the air, hitting the old woman on the head at extremely high speeds. She was immediately killed on contact.

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Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

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what do you call white people running down a mountain? Avalanche What do you call black people running down a mountain? Jailbreak

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What did the oboe say to the trombone? SQUEEEEEEK

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A racist man walks into an all black church. He has no problem with the people there as he is a black man who hates caucasion people.

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Why was Junior sad? His parents were killed in a car crash.

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whats worse than getting no gifts for christmas? getting hit by a bus for christmas

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Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

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What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of tree? A Pool Table

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you know its foggy outside when you step outside and its foggy outside.

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what electronic vegetable sits in a chair? stephen hawking

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Yup, I mean we use all of your techniques and all things considered the messages end up looking pretty much the same, as if the same person had written them, Azure is named Carlos, and well, he is pretty much a computer wiz so you have nothing to worry about.

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Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

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Lucas talks to mom she says hi

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What did the muslim get for christmas? Nothing.

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Don't make my new Nazi friend upset, or he'll be Fuhrerious

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A bird flew into a cave and Batman said, "GET OOOUUUTTT!"

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Do you have emotional issues, ever have a really bad day and just wanna talk call this number (402-314-5287) < N1GGER

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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