What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

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Why did the Chicken cross the Road? To get to the other side! (To fully appreciate the subtle nuisances of this joke, you really have to be a chicken.)

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My momma's so ugly she had to get plastic surgery. Now I need it.

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Two ladies are walking down a road. One says, "It's freezing out here!" and then the other woman, who is a scientist, says "No it's not freezing. The freezing point of oxygen is -365.82 degrees F. So, unless it is actually that temperature outdoors, I highly doubt that it is freezing outside."

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two tomatos walked over the road and..... just kidding tomatos can't walk.

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What did the orphan get christmas? CANCER

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Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

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What is white and square? A ping pong block

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Whats green and has wheels? A green car.

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Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

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what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

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why did the black man go to jail why he raped your mom

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What's a fat chinaman? A guy who somehow got obese on rice. HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN?!

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y does byonce sing to the left? because black people have no rights

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why couldnt the black man fly, becuse his master said he coudnt.

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Why did the boy jizz?...........he was getting a blowjob!!!

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What do you get when you cross a bungie cord and an owl? My ass :)

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What did the ghost say when it stubbed its toe? Ow

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My uncle Magnus and my Aunty Agnus had a baby and named it.............Death.

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How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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