Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory? She made skittles.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets wasted and forgets the punchline.

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Where did Susie go when the bomb went of? Everywhere?

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Your momma is so stupid, because she didn't get a proper education

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Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

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Am I a cat? No, I am a human; cat's cannot type.

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what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

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Whats worse being raped by jack the ripper or being fingered by captain hook

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Knock Knock Whos there? It was the unexpected arrival of his wifes lover who'd been having an affair with her for over a year She thought her husband would be out and forgot to tell him not to come The husband started breaking down in tears whilst throwing insults at both of them, grabbing the man by his collar and throwing him on the ground he started to kick his head in The man died and the husband and wife divorced, theres now a bench in the mans local park dedicated to him.

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know whats funnier than 24? 25.

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Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

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What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

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What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

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Why couldn't little Sally fall asleep? She was on fire.

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Why was the girl crying? - Someone pooped on her face.

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A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why was Why added to why? Because WHy not.

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Why did the clown want a new bike? Don't ask me, clowns are allowed to want things too

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A Jehovah's Witness knocks on my door. I didn't answer the door.

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I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

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The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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