How many retarded mexicans can you fit in a smart car? Two.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Spanish Inquisition.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A penguin in a blender.

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Remember when they called online casino`s betting sport? Anti Joke potential detected. I used to play soccer and box back then, but I guess I was still not "sporty" enough for betting sports... And as thus I afforded my lawyer education. Moral: Now that you know my education, do you really think id ever type real morals here? Mwahahahaha!

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? According to the theory of evolution, chickens are descendent's of dinosaurs, meaning that a dinosaur laid an egg, eventually creating a chicken thus meaning that the egg came first.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall of the second time? I pushed her.

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Whats worse than your shoe being untied? 911

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Why did the family have no Christmas tree this year? Because they are Jewish.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you!

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I hate long jokes -_-

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How do you cripple a fireman? You push him down the stairs.

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How do you get 100 illegal immigrants into a furnace? Tell 'em it's England.

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I'm a boy... I like hamburgers... Xbox is my favorite activity.... I have a dog... My dad is cheap... He's my doctor, my dentist, and my mom... Haha get it?

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Two people went to a planetarium to see a movie about the solar system. They came out smarter than when they had first walked in.

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What happens every 5 seconds? An African kid dies.

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What is red and itchy? Something that itches and it turns red if you itch it to much

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why did the chicken cross the road ask jake darby

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what's the fastest way to have someone murder you tell your wife you are cheating on her

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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What do you call Bilbo Baggins when you use him for pleasure? Dildo Baggins

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Guess What! HI!

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Q. What is black and nobody cares when they step on it? A. Asphalt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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