What did the Man say to the elephant Nothing this man does not speak, the elephant does though

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Your mom is soooo fat..... She'll most likely suffer a heart attack

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What do you call a black man who works in a ice-cream truck? A Ice-Creem Man

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Want to hear a funny joke? Womens rights.

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A duck walks into a bar.... Animal control is swiftly called and the duck is relocated to a nearby park.

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Q: why was the cow in the middle of the road? A: because it was dead

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Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

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What's black and white and red all over? Two nuns in a chainsaw fight.

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knock knock who is there? Jehovah's Witness... IT IS the desire of Jehovah's Witnesses that you become better acquainted with them. You may have met them as neighbors and fellow employees or in other daily affairs of life. You may have seen them on the street, offering their magazines to passersby. Or you may have spoken briefly with them at your door. Actually, Jehovah's Witnesses are interested in you and your welfare. They want to be your friends and to tell you more about themselves, their beliefs, their organization, and how they feel about people and the world in which all of us live. To accomplish this, they have prepared this brochure for you. In most ways Jehovah's Witnesses are like everyone else. They have normal problems—economic, physical, emotional. They make mistakes at times, for they are not perfect, inspired, or infallible. But they try to learn from their experiences and diligently study the Bible to make needed corrections. They have made a dedication to God to do his will, and they apply themselves to fulfill this dedication. In all their activities they seek guidance from God's Word and his holy spirit.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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What is 0+0? 0, I am not dumb

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Your Black, Im Black, We're all Black

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THIS IS an anti-joke.

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say this really fast D I C K, C H I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, C H I CK, D I C K IF YOU CANT LIKE IT

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How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

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Wow did you see stevie wonder's new house. neither has he

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Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

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Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? They were tossing frisbee and accidentally threw it into their neighbors yard.

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Sex is not the answer. Sex is a question. Yes is the answer.

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A man walks into a bar. He then meets some friends and has a rather enjoyable night.

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why was little johns' stomach in discomfort? because his mom accidently gave him mercury for breakfast

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Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

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What did the girl say when she arrived at the party? "I like what you did with the furniture!"

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I was walking through the woods the other day when I heard a rustle in the bushes... So I went over and said, "Russell, What are you doing in the bushes?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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