How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

What do you call a black man driving a bus? By his name

How many Jew can you fit in a car? As many as the car seats comfortably.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the same wolf that had devoured the chickens' chicks singlehandedly was chasing it.

What kind of sex do you have with twenty seven year olds any kind you want there are twenty of them

What did the Muslim have under his hood of his car? A V-8 engine.

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

Why did Kelly never see Wass? cus she never looked in right places !!!

What was the tallest mountain before Mount Everest was discovered? Mount Everest

Q. what did the gay man say about the smoothie? A. he said "that is soooo good"

Your mother is so rotund, in fact she went to a weight loss clinic... but gained weight

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

Why Was Did Jill Cross The Road? She Needed To Get To Work.

I pooped my pants

Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head underwater for a long time.

A dislexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to enjoy the breasts that he has stumbled upon.p

How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

A player under the tag "KiTcHeNGuRLxGaMerZ143" got a message after finishing a map on call of duty. "lol ur good."

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because her dad through a fridge at her

What's the difference between a turtle and a horse? The horse has no shell.

a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar... they sit down, have a deep and meaningful conversation about theism, and don't really drink anything.

Why was the white man rich and the black man poor? Because when the white man was 11 and he didn't have a job because 11 year olds don't get hired, because its not legal, he use to pick up pennies. And when the black man was 11 he got a job mowing lawns and ended up being a lawyer graduate and spent the rest of his life paying off his school loan. The white man lived in the 70's and the black man lived in he twentieth century.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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