Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

Whats a dwarf running A running dwarf

Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

Halo < COD

How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

Q: How do you fit 100 mexicans in a van? A: Its theoretically impossible.

you will now laugh.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

There's no "i" in tim.

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

So a black man, a white man and a latina walk into a sentence that doesn't end how you expected it to.

Two Penn-State Advisors walk into a butt.

Knock knock. Who's there? John John who John

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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