Lindsay Lohan is often caught flashing her vagina...

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Why couldn't sally drive her car? Because sally is a girl.

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A man walks into a bar. Realizing that he left his keys in his car, he called a locksmith to unlock the doors. He did not have money to pay this locksmith and was put in prison for his large sums of debt. He was shanked by a fellow inmate and died a few days later in the prison's hospital ward.

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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i cannot get my penis to rise to the occasion, it is the holocaust tho..

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9/11/2001

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I walked into town today and bumped into a butcher, a baker and a candlestick maker. It meant nothing to me because I was never read nursery rhymes as a child due to my parents both dying before I was conceived

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They give psychiatric patients acting classes in order for them to express and as such heal themselves? Excuse me fucktard! A guy that has deluded himself into believing he is the 11.356th Napoleon does not require further acting classes!

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what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

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What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? Mittens

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What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner fudge is made. This market has a very dynamic and fresh selection.

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why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

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roses are red violet are blu--- blue? violets are violet! weird, isn't it?

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What do Jews, Jehovah's Witnesses, Slavs, Gays, and Retards have in common? The Holocaust.

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why did the chicken cross the road because everyone on the other side already had bird flu

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What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

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1 woman and 2 guys were on a roadtrip. Every single day they would go do the same things. First go to Denny's, then to the mall, then see a horror movie. One day the woman said, "I don't want to go see the horror movie, I'm scared enough!" So the guys agreed that they'd trick the woman into going to a horror movie before Denny's. They went, and the woman was scared out of her mind. She yelled at them both for 30 minutes and to this day never speaks to them.

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i dislike sack in my mouth

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a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

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What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

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A black man, a hispanic man, and an asian man all walk into a biker bar. The bartender asks them if they know that this is a biker bar. All three say yes and tell the bartender that they are in the same motorcycle club. The bartender serves them a beer.

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What's worse than the front page of anti-joke.com? The 4945th page of anti-joke.com, as those jokes have been rated poorly by other users.

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"Knock, Knock" "Go away, I have a lot of stuff to do right now and knock knock jokes suck."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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