Two jews walk into a bar. They laugh over a beer and leave

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the mailman delivering your weekly delivery

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

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what do you call a fish without eyes? a fshhhhh

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GAY PEOPLE

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Which one is hardest?

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what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

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Why din't the boy get a Christmas present? Because his dad go hit by a bus.

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A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

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The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

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Once you go black you may be more open to dating a second black person.

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Q: Why was Seven afraid of Eight? A: He was octophobic.

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What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

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What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

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What's the difference between an old quarter and a new penny? 24 cents

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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Billy isn't a homosexual, he just has sex with men. Billy has sex with men, because Billy's in prison.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

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What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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