Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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What do a duck and an elephant have in common? They're both yellow. Except for the elephant.

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A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face. The shark replies i dont have cancer just a terrible drinking problem.

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What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her statement.

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What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Get in the car

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers

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9 little monkeys jumping on the bed... One fell off and died!

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What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb. Two. But it would have to be a very big lightbulb to fit both of them in there.

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Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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how do u get a nun off the bottom of a cruise ship you untie her

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? Nay.

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Dementia Dementia who Knock, Knock

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Why dose not the cat bark? Because it's a cat!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops