what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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What did the vegetarian eat for christmas? Food.

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A Christian, a Jew, and a Hindu walked into a bar - guess what happened then? Well two of them are alcoholics so they wisely changed their minds and left, then the other one got bored so he left too.

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to the one below me. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the white guy the black guy and the Asian all have in common Penises

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Religion

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"did you hear about the midget's self-murder?" "No, what happend?" "He jumped off the curb"

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What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

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A man and his son are in a store, the man says to his son, "That candy bar has your name on it." The son replies, "I wish that you didn't name me Butterfingers." The dad answers, "I wish that you were never born."

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

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What do you call a bunch of black people in a red car.... A jaffa

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What's a rabbit's favourite food? No-one knows, like humans, every rabbit has it's own favourite food.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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knock, knock. use the doorbell next time.

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Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

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The mets are 3-0 this season

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I wanted to burn some calories, so i lit a fat kid on fire

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women's rights

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Whats worse then nailing ten babies to a tree? Nailing one dead baby to ten trees.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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what makes white men feel embarrassed and and ashamed? when they find out their girllfriend has been sleeping with a black man.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need some money.

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How you make a duck cry? Raping it. How you make it shut up? Killing it. Why did no one helped the duck? Because the duck has no friends.

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A Jew returns change.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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