One time there was a guy who jumped off a bridge and died

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What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

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Why did the teenager take a shower? Because she was brutally raped by a serial rapist and felt dirty. Unfortunately for her, she was unaware that she was washing off the prints from her body and the rapist was never found

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Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

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Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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Why couldn't the blonde have kids? She had Ovarian Cancer.

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whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

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Q: How do you kill a Brazilian Blind Electric Ray? A: Killing endangered species is a crime.

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What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

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Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

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What smells like bananas but is invisible? Monkey farts

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Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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