is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

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Q: Why is eminem such a good rapper? A: well if you want to know its becuase he had a bad childhood experience and and needed some money so he put hard work and dedication into rapping.

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Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

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What did the octopus say to the lion? Nothing, because the likely hood of a lion and an octopus meeting is incredibly slim, as an octopus is a sea creature, and a lion isn't. A lion and an octopus cant even communicate with each other anyway, so even if they did come across each other they wouldn’t be able to talk. Octopi are also anti-social creatures by nature so I can say with some confidence that the lion and the octopus will not have a convocation. Written By JAMES!

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what is the difference between the dead baby and the sandwich? i don't put my penis into the sandwich before i eat it.

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Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

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What do you call a black man that nicks your car? All we can say is that he is called the Nig

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

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Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

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What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops