Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

thumb_up thumb_down -60

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -132

What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

why did the ginger start crying. because people through bricks at him!

thumb_up thumb_down +49

One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

thumb_up thumb_down +27

clamidia

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

thumb_up thumb_down +25

The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the dog say to the cat? I have no idea. I wasn't there.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why didn't the chicken cross tithe road Because it was a motorway

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the boy cry? because his tear-ducts were agitated by an emotional reaction due to jokes that were ironically hilarious because of how bland and usual the punchlines were

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Steve Jobs didn't die. He went to go set up iCLOUD.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops