What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

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How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

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Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

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Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

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Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

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Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

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A white man, a black man and an asian walked into a bar. They got a drink and discussed multiple issues of the day and then went their seperate ways home.

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You Know Wats Funny? Jokes....

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Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

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why did the titanic sink, it was hit by a iceberg

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How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doc, I blacked out last night and have a sore ass." The doctor took some x-rays and informed him he had colon cancer.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Why did Jake fall off his bike? His mom threw a fridge at him.

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get off me you fat b*tch or i will mash you up like a potato

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Man walks into a bar and goes, "Ouch!"

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A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

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A boy with red hair is happy.

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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Why did the women cross the road? I dont know.. why? no clue.. why was she out of the kitchen

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A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

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The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

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There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

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A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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