Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Yo mama so fat, that she feels uncomfortable in a bathing suit.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why wasn't Will invited to the party? Will has been dead for 3 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was suicidal.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the cat say to the hamster? Meow

thumb_up thumb_down -23

whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A father was angry at his daughter's boyfriend because he took her virginity. The boyfriend said he was ashamed that he never told her he has AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red Violets are blue I don't like poems What rhymes with poem?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Yo mama so dirty she takes a shower every night

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Dave:Hi Mark:Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What happened when the blind man was running toward a cliff. He stopped before he fell.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. A number is a mathematical object used to count and measure.It is not a living thing and therefore does not possess thoughts and feelings.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man walks into bar and orders a drink. The bartender says " Hey I saw a bunch of men coming in and out of your house while you were on vacation last week." The man replied " I know. That's because my wife is a prostitute."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Me - "Wanna hear something that will make me laugh?" *giggles* friend - "Sure." teehee if anyone gets it.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: what's the difference between a young, geeky kid living in Wisconsin's basketball and Yao Ming's basketball? A: young, geeky kids cannot live in Wisconsin's basketball. Wisconsin is a state, and states cannot own objects because they aren't sentient beings. And Yao Ming's basketball... is just a regular basketball that happens to be owned by Yao Ming.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A rooster is sitting on the top of a house. It lays an egg. Which way does it roll? This can be solved by using the dimensions and angles of the roof to find the most probable direction it would roll (Incorporating in the power of gravity of course). Of course if the egg from the roosters uteris came out in an akward or unlikely way, it could roll the other way.This can be factored in very quickly because with the video evidence of the rooster having the egg you can see how it was delivered(the video is not of which way it rolls, just of the delivery).

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How many ants are in the kitchen? None. We killed them all.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the boy eat the hedgehog? Because it made his mouth bleed,

thumb_up thumb_down -25

how many baby's does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why you don't laught when you see a black guy on a scooter? Because it could be your.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops