A girl was walking home from school, she had a pizza box in her hands, her mom was waiting for her in the car to take her to T.G.I.F, and then she dropped the pizza box in the middle of the street. In a frantic attemp to get the box, she run out into the middle of the street and got hit by a semi. Her funeral is tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did god smite the homosex man with all of heavens wrath? For shits and gigs.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Sarah went to church one day and went into the confession booth with her pastor. He made sure nobody was in the church, and proceeded to allow her to confess. He didn't molest her. However, when Sarah got home her abusive stepfather beat her to death in an alcoholic rage and shot himself. It was on the news.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

thumb_up thumb_down +43

So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's the best way to get gum out of your hair? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +43

There's two bears in the shower. One bear says "pass the soap". The other bear says "no soap. Radio".

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the Mexican jump the fence? Because he didn't feel like walking around the house to the side where the gate was to get out of the backyard

thumb_up thumb_down +41

If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Yo momma's so bulimic, and there's nothing funny about it at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

This comment has been removed for too many average votes.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Have you seen the painting by Stevie Wonder? It's a Monet and this museum's most prized piece. Just kindly ask Mr. Wonder to step aside a bit.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Sucks to be a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why was the little boy upset? He was on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call white people that live in a trailer park? Residents.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

There are two monkeys sittingn a bathtub. The first one says, "Scratch my back Mack." The second one says, "That's okay Joe I've got a radio of my own." (laugh like you think it is funny)

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's worse than giong to Hell? Nothing. Hell is as bad as it gets.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why was the man waiting at the bus stop? He was on his way to work

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender was incredibly biased towards religion and had the rabbi removed.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Whats as flat as a pancake and alive Ya nan being flattened by a truck on the motorway

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops