You've heard of take your child to work day, but I bet you haven't heard of 9/11- take your plane to work day

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was uneducated and was not aware of the dangers of streets in heavily populated cities.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the little boy? May God be with you.

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Why did the child get an 100% on a test?? Because they got all the questions correct.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Your mother is so stupid that she has trouble discerning certain facts from fiction.

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What's the difference between a tomato and a rhinoceros? Neither of them can ride a bicycle.

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Why did the mathematician cross the road? To get his mail.

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Why didn't the boy have any toes? - Because he did not have any legs.

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 witnessed while hiding in a closit 7 rape and kill his mother.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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Why did the redneck ask his daughter to get on her knees? His shoe was untied.

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Why was the first name of the boy 'Price'? His parents were Hamsters.

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A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

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Why are tootsie rolls brown? because they are....

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why did the man buy Trojan for his women? It's condom curtsey.

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So snoop dog drank some milk! :)

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What has two legs but can't walk? A quadriplegic man who lost mobility in his legs due to a horrific logging accident.

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What is quite heavy and if it falls off a tree and hits you in your head you die? A sheets packet

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Dad: "Happy birthday, son! Let's go get a beer." Timmy: "But dad, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are, we hope that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? No such thing.” Timmy's mom had just died of cancer a few days ago. A friend walks in the door, not knowing Timmy's mom died just a few short days before his birthday. He screams, "Happy birthday!" TImmy: "Damn. I'm not going through this again."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

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i am an inbred jew who likes penis up my bum ~Nathan Barras

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops