What does a person and a tree have in common? You can knock them down if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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Why Can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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spell backwards: taco cat

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Why did the black kid fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome

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What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

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A man spills his his drink. Like any other man would do, he got some paper towels and some mult-purpose cleaner and proceeded to wipe up the mess. Not a further word was said about the situation.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Boo I don't know anyone by the name of Boo. Go away

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I swear to god it wasn't me! Dont swear to god its a sin !

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KNOCK! KNOCK! Who's there?! ... Ditched again!

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Why couldn't the young pirate get in to the movie? Because he wasn't old enough.

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What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

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What's purple and in my hand? Nothing i was lying about the purple

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A black guy walks into his bar. So he pays his tab and couldn't have been more coureious.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

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Luke Hardie is G@Y

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What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

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How do you kill half of Mexico? You use nuclear weapons in major cities.

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An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

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A man named Joe has practiced drawing cartoon characters his entire life. When Joe turns 15 he decides to enter a local drawing competeiton. Joe works very hard drawing his cartoon and finally finishes. When it is the time to hand in his drawing his drawing, he hands it in an receives a satisfying 2nd place and continues on with his life. Two years later Joe decides to enter another drawing competeiton (this one much more competitive) after his drawing skills have tremendously increased. He begins drawing and is 3/4 of the way finished when Joe is brutally murdered by a mentally disturbed man and cannot hand in his art work and is therefore disqualified from the competeiton and loses.

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A tiger walks into a bar, the patrons ran out terrified.

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What do you call a guy and two girls are at the bottom of the ocean? A guy and two girls at the bottom of the ocean.

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What would you rather do or drag a board?

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Ipod to earbuds: "hey buds" earbuds response: "sup player"

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What white and black and red all over? The wife who refused to report that her husband abused her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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