What did bob say when he was told his beloved parents were dying? "oh"

Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

Allah walked into AK Bar

What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

eh

why is ur dad an alcoholic? he drinks a lot of alcohol

There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

How can a man go 8 days without sleeping? Sleep at night.

WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

What human can fly without holding any thing (exept cloths i dont like inapropeate jokes i dont know it a very intresting quesiton

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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