How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

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An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

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A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

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What's white and horny? a unicorn.

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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In soviet russia, the cow milks you!

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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Hey babe, do you like going to sleep without shoes on? Because most people find it more comforting to remove footwear in order to rest and relax peacefully during bedtime.

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Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

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Midgets' mouths are perfect height for, kissing other midgets.

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What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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Obama

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Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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How do you make an electrician cry? Kill his family.

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I've just been struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. I am covered in boils and my house is full of frogs. I strongly recommend that when referring to God, always use the upper case 'H' on all personal pronouns.

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Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

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What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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