Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

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A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

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Your mom is so fat, she weighs 732 kilograms.

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Cornflakes were an accident, so was Chernobyl

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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HA HA HA HA HAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHYHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA - Bomber

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Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

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Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

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Friends are like trampolines, I always wanted a trampoline

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Kevin stinks signed Taggart. Is this how you do it!!!

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You just read this ..

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what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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why ya gotta be so rude? cause i can

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

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Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops