What is the worst part about dying? no-one cause no-one has ever survived dying to know what it is like so how is it possible that I would know

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Why is Wednesday a bad day? Because at some point, Monday will come around again.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

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What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens just walk places. they have no agenda.

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What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

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What did the chair say to the fan? Nothing. Chairs and fans are objects so they do not have the physical ability to talk.

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What's worse than being arrested? Being arrested twice

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Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

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Three men walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 6 being the highest how confused are you?

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A man with two broken legs walks into a bar.

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

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did Michael Jackson touch children ? yes of course. otherwise he would have been an absolutely terrible father

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Uber Driver: "Hey I'm close, where are you?" Me: "oh, I see you!" Uber Driver: "Are you that guy in the middle of the road?" Me: "yeah, floor it"

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Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

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what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being hit by a plane.

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I like my coffee like I like my women. Ground up and in the freezer

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SKnock Knock. Whose there? Why don't you open the door and find out instead of questioning the millions of other people that knock on your door everyday?

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

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2 gay men walked into a bar, The next day they want back to the bar, They went back on the third day but only 1 man came back out and he was in tears, This was because the other man had a cardiac arrest and died.

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Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

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* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops