Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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What happened after Jimmy fell off the cliff? He died.

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copy me and i will kill you

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what's worse than jamming a finger in a door the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust jamming 2 fingers in a door

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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an atheist and a christian meet in a bar they chat about football, order some pints, and have a really good night.

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

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What do you call a homeless man in Beverly Hills? Charles, Someone who unfortunately had to drop out of school at a young age to work to support his dying mother. Hence, later in life, after his mother died, lacked the education to be enrolled in college forcing him to pimp to make enough money to eat and pay for the rent in his one bedroom appartment in his hometown-Mississippi. But times were tough in Mississippi and not many people could afford a whore. This forces him to go all the way to California where he found more people there were willing to pay for a whore. Business was good and soon enough he had enough money for a decent condo. But Charles still morned the death of his mother. Eventually he couldn't take the daily pressure of being a pimp and thought of his mothers death, so he turned to heroin. Soon all his money was fueling his addiction and before he knew it he was on the street, with no one to help him and no where's to go. Every night he goes to sleep on his cardboard box with the memory of his late mother in the back of his head. Sometimes Charles wonders what he could of been if he didn't drop out of school, but he knows that what he did was the right thing.

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Kid 1 Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken. Kid 2 Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys. Kid 1 You know what? I think you're right Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

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Is it colder on a farm than in the winter?

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What's redder than a red apple? 2 red apples

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There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

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A black man walks up to a white man with a shaved head and boots in a bar He then hands him a ten dollar bill and tells him he dropped it

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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