How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

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asdasdasdasd

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Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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Why did John break down in tears? Because he was molested as a child.

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Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

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Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fish:)

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1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

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How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

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Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

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A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

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Knock knock Go fuck yourself

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Why did sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally

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Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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